I dreamt I was in a house with my good friend…..I was upstairs and he was downstairs…..A friend of his turned up and he began to drink alcohol with him…..and they were laughing together…. Then other people started turning up at the house, unbeknownst to me…..and a party started happening….My friend had organised it…. These were people I had never heard of or seen before but they were all friends of my good friend and he was happy and kissing and hugging everyone as they came in.

Someone arrived with food and a cooker, a professional and food started to be cooked, my friend was so happy and laughing and joking and being really sociable with everyone…. At one point my daughter arrived and she hopped on the bed with my friend…..they were cosily chatting to each other and laughing…..I got upset but I was ignored….there were other people on this bed with them, there wasn’t anything untoward going on with My daughter and My friend, it was just fun….but I felt upset… Another thing that happened was a lady came in who was very familiar to myfriend and they started kissing…..in a lovers kind of way and I did get upset at that and said something and my friend just said…..it doesn’t mean anything, she and I have known each other for years and its what we always do when we are with each other…..

I left but the fun went on before I left….my friend was having a great time as were his friends and I couldn’t join in because I was ill and my friend hadn’t told me anything about the party happening anyway.

The next day When I spoke to my friend, all he said was that my daughter got home ok, the people who came to do the catering dropped her off…so alls well there……..

and I woke up….

My feelings when I woke were of insecuirity and wanting to talk to someone to explore the dream as felt it meant a huge amount.

I know my friend and I haven’t seen each other this week, we have spoken on the phone every day and he has sounded very happy without me and I did ask him because he sounded so happy and he said yes he was happy and I asked why and he said I suppose its because I am free wheeling and doing exactly what I want to do….(which made me feel sad that he was far happier without me)

My friend isn’t a party person….he is awkward in social settings, he wouldnt choose to go and certainly wouldn’t instigate a party….but he is very clumsy with folk, me especially…..he puts his foot in it by being brutally honest and tactless and this is why I’m exploring the Autism angle….as I know  my friend to be a good person but he hurt s me frequently with his way of being and I need to protect myself……

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